Don’t tell me…I will tell YOU!
By Bridgette Raes
While watching a style show on television recently the host announced some fabulous new trend that I simply "had" to buy. I rolled my eyes and changed the channel. It isn’t that I don’t appreciate the update on what is and isn’t trendy to wear, but there is something about being told what I “should" wear, or “must have” that leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. One of my biggest fashion pet peeves is cookie-cutter style, which means seeing tons of women walking around all looking the same because they have allowed others to dictate to them.
When did individual style go out the window? My feeling on buying trends is that these styles are put in the stores and in the magazines, and then it's my decision whether or not they fit my style. And in addition to my decision about whether I want to buy a certain trend or not, it's also my decision how I am going to wear a trend. When the "trend gurus" start laying down the law about what I simply must wear to be cool or hip, it brings back memories of being offered a cigarette in high school and the strange pressure I felt to take a drag. The last thing we want shopping to feel like is a bad afterschool special pressuring us to think that if we don’t cling on to all the trends we won’t be cool.
I LOVE fashion - I have worked in the fashion industry for almost fifteen years. The thing I love most about my relationship to fashion is that I am in control of my choices. How do I know that I am in control of my choices? I never feel like I am wearing a costume. The number one way to know if you are falling victim to the trends, or if you are wearing something simply because someone says it is cool, is to ask yourself just how comfortable you feel in what you are wearing. It isn’t that I don’t happily jump on board with some of the latest trends, but at the end of the day I decide without feeling any pressure to look or dress in a particular way.
Truly being stylish means learning how to express who you are on the inside through your clothing, and when this happens there is a feeling of total connection between your inner and outer selves. You work less to be understood, you feel comfortable in your own skin and most importantly, you are self expressed. Conversely, if you are someone who chooses clothing because someone on TV said that you had to buy it and you did, then you ultimately find yourself feeling like you are layering on your clothing - so much so that it almost feels like you have coated your body with a layer of concealer. Then, girlfriend…we gotta talk!
All you fashionistas who read my newsletter are now asking yourselves where that unsubscribe button to this newsletter is, because you have decided that you have simply heard enough of my ranting, but wait - hang on.
Let’s talk for a minute about who we worship as stylish women. Grace Kelly, Audrey Hepburn, and Jackie O are examples that many of us have in our minds as the classic iconic beauties. There certainly are some more modern examples, but for arguments sake let’s use these three because I think we can all relate. Why do we honor these women as icons? What made them different? What made them stand out? It certainly wasn’t that they blindly followed what everyone else was doing.
Here are some of my thoughts:
They were leaders not followers
It wasn’t that any of these women were anti-fashion; in fact, these women were often muses for designers and that is why we worship them as fashion icons. The first difference between these fashion icons and many of the cookie-cutter trend followers of today is that these women set a standard and they were never dictated to by others. They were leaders, not followers.
Being a lover of fashion does not necessarily mean that you simply follow along with the herd. Being a lover of fashion means that you not only appreciate trends but you know how to make them work specifically for you. You can see what is in the store and know what to do with it.
They wore their clothing, their clothing didn’t wear them
This is a paramount point that often goes overlooked. The difference between these style icons vs. many women today is that any of the style icons chose clothing that complemented them. A common pitfall that I often see is that I see is that we put fashion first and ourselves second. We don’t take into consideration our lifestyle, our physical characteristics, our goals, our personal style. Oddly, these key points often go ignored. Or we look at our very real lives and figure that our lifestyle just isn’t wired to allow us to be fashionable. The key goal when getting dressed is to put yourself into that driver’s seat and really get to know yourself on all levels. Clothing should merely be an enhancement tool that you use for self-expression.
The style icons never let their clothing speak louder than they did. There was a total package to the way these women dressed. If your outfit is a huge exclamation that shouts louder than you do then you are doing yourself a disservice, for in the end all you are is a walking billboard. I don’t know about you, but I always want myself to be noticed over my clothing.
They were stylish not trendy
Trendy and stylish are two very different words with very different meanings. Trendy is something that is timely or of the moment; stylish is a timeless uniqueness that is individual to every woman. If being stylish isn’t about timeless sophistication then why did Audrey Hepburn look stylish in a black turtleneck and a pair of jeans or a little black dress? Where is the trendiness in those two outfits?
Your style may not necessarily be classic and you may lean more towards a more modern "trendy" look, but my recommendation on choosing things that are very trendy or of the moment is to not go into trend overload. Many of my clients favor a more classic stylish look, but they also complain that they often feel boring and blah. So what I do with them is enhance or modernize a very staid classic look with some hints of trend. We will take a very classic outfit and punch it up with a really trendy bag or pair of shoes, for example. Approaching trend this way can ensure that you don’t walk around looking like a trend victim.
Key points to follow for calling the style shots:
Put passion into it - Don’t buy something just because someone says so. If you don’t love it, don’t buy it.
Don’t be a walking billboard - Clothing should support you, not the other way around.
Tweak the classics with trend - One of the best ways to be trendy is in small doses. Use trendy items to enhance your look so that you never go into trend overload.
Incorporate a trend only if it supports your existing wardrobe - Always think about what you have in your wardrobe before you bring something very trendy home. This way it will blend right in rather than being a glaring blemish that hangs in your closet unworn.
(c) 2005 Bridgette Raes Style Group
Sign up for our weekly newsletter where we not only offer weekly style article written by Bridgette Raes, but also include Style Q&A, Upcoming events, advice from our resident "What To Do Girl", organizing, beauty and financial tips by visiting http://www.bridgetteraes.com/
While watching a style show on television recently the host announced some fabulous new trend that I simply "had" to buy. I rolled my eyes and changed the channel. It isn’t that I don’t appreciate the update on what is and isn’t trendy to wear, but there is something about being told what I “should" wear, or “must have” that leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. One of my biggest fashion pet peeves is cookie-cutter style, which means seeing tons of women walking around all looking the same because they have allowed others to dictate to them.
When did individual style go out the window? My feeling on buying trends is that these styles are put in the stores and in the magazines, and then it's my decision whether or not they fit my style. And in addition to my decision about whether I want to buy a certain trend or not, it's also my decision how I am going to wear a trend. When the "trend gurus" start laying down the law about what I simply must wear to be cool or hip, it brings back memories of being offered a cigarette in high school and the strange pressure I felt to take a drag. The last thing we want shopping to feel like is a bad afterschool special pressuring us to think that if we don’t cling on to all the trends we won’t be cool.
I LOVE fashion - I have worked in the fashion industry for almost fifteen years. The thing I love most about my relationship to fashion is that I am in control of my choices. How do I know that I am in control of my choices? I never feel like I am wearing a costume. The number one way to know if you are falling victim to the trends, or if you are wearing something simply because someone says it is cool, is to ask yourself just how comfortable you feel in what you are wearing. It isn’t that I don’t happily jump on board with some of the latest trends, but at the end of the day I decide without feeling any pressure to look or dress in a particular way.
Truly being stylish means learning how to express who you are on the inside through your clothing, and when this happens there is a feeling of total connection between your inner and outer selves. You work less to be understood, you feel comfortable in your own skin and most importantly, you are self expressed. Conversely, if you are someone who chooses clothing because someone on TV said that you had to buy it and you did, then you ultimately find yourself feeling like you are layering on your clothing - so much so that it almost feels like you have coated your body with a layer of concealer. Then, girlfriend…we gotta talk!
All you fashionistas who read my newsletter are now asking yourselves where that unsubscribe button to this newsletter is, because you have decided that you have simply heard enough of my ranting, but wait - hang on.
Let’s talk for a minute about who we worship as stylish women. Grace Kelly, Audrey Hepburn, and Jackie O are examples that many of us have in our minds as the classic iconic beauties. There certainly are some more modern examples, but for arguments sake let’s use these three because I think we can all relate. Why do we honor these women as icons? What made them different? What made them stand out? It certainly wasn’t that they blindly followed what everyone else was doing.
Here are some of my thoughts:
They were leaders not followers
It wasn’t that any of these women were anti-fashion; in fact, these women were often muses for designers and that is why we worship them as fashion icons. The first difference between these fashion icons and many of the cookie-cutter trend followers of today is that these women set a standard and they were never dictated to by others. They were leaders, not followers.
Being a lover of fashion does not necessarily mean that you simply follow along with the herd. Being a lover of fashion means that you not only appreciate trends but you know how to make them work specifically for you. You can see what is in the store and know what to do with it.
They wore their clothing, their clothing didn’t wear them
This is a paramount point that often goes overlooked. The difference between these style icons vs. many women today is that any of the style icons chose clothing that complemented them. A common pitfall that I often see is that I see is that we put fashion first and ourselves second. We don’t take into consideration our lifestyle, our physical characteristics, our goals, our personal style. Oddly, these key points often go ignored. Or we look at our very real lives and figure that our lifestyle just isn’t wired to allow us to be fashionable. The key goal when getting dressed is to put yourself into that driver’s seat and really get to know yourself on all levels. Clothing should merely be an enhancement tool that you use for self-expression.
The style icons never let their clothing speak louder than they did. There was a total package to the way these women dressed. If your outfit is a huge exclamation that shouts louder than you do then you are doing yourself a disservice, for in the end all you are is a walking billboard. I don’t know about you, but I always want myself to be noticed over my clothing.
They were stylish not trendy
Trendy and stylish are two very different words with very different meanings. Trendy is something that is timely or of the moment; stylish is a timeless uniqueness that is individual to every woman. If being stylish isn’t about timeless sophistication then why did Audrey Hepburn look stylish in a black turtleneck and a pair of jeans or a little black dress? Where is the trendiness in those two outfits?
Your style may not necessarily be classic and you may lean more towards a more modern "trendy" look, but my recommendation on choosing things that are very trendy or of the moment is to not go into trend overload. Many of my clients favor a more classic stylish look, but they also complain that they often feel boring and blah. So what I do with them is enhance or modernize a very staid classic look with some hints of trend. We will take a very classic outfit and punch it up with a really trendy bag or pair of shoes, for example. Approaching trend this way can ensure that you don’t walk around looking like a trend victim.
Key points to follow for calling the style shots:
Put passion into it - Don’t buy something just because someone says so. If you don’t love it, don’t buy it.
Don’t be a walking billboard - Clothing should support you, not the other way around.
Tweak the classics with trend - One of the best ways to be trendy is in small doses. Use trendy items to enhance your look so that you never go into trend overload.
Incorporate a trend only if it supports your existing wardrobe - Always think about what you have in your wardrobe before you bring something very trendy home. This way it will blend right in rather than being a glaring blemish that hangs in your closet unworn.
(c) 2005 Bridgette Raes Style Group
Sign up for our weekly newsletter where we not only offer weekly style article written by Bridgette Raes, but also include Style Q&A, Upcoming events, advice from our resident "What To Do Girl", organizing, beauty and financial tips by visiting http://www.bridgetteraes.com/
posted by Unknown @ 6:32 PM
